Some time ago I came across a poem that really struck me. Perhaps you’ve seen it also. It read:
If there is right in the soul,
There will be contentment in the person.
If there is contentment in the person,
There will be harmony in the home.
If there is harmony in the home,
There will be order in the nation.
If there is order in the nation,
There will be peace in the world.
When I look at all the crime, mental illness, and truth spinning happening all around us every day, I can only conclude that’s there’s a lot of people out there whose souls are not in the right place.
And on some occasions, we might all have misaligned souls that are not exactly right. They’re not exactly where they should be or need to be. And that’s unfortunate because all happiness and success, in your personal and professional lives starts in your soul.
The good news is, your soul … your character … can be developed. You’re not stuck with such things as being “a natural-born liar … a lazy good for nothing … a just-do-enough-to-get-by person … someone who lacks confidence … a person who doesn’t seem to be going anywhere … someone who’s stuck in their comfort zone … a person who always looks on the negative side of things … someone who can’t make relationships work” or a hundred other labels.
You can build yourself into a person of character. You can become a person you like and respect and others admire and want to follow. It’s a part of what I teach on Day 1 of my Journey-to-the-Extraordinary experience coming October 3-4, 2024.
Do this to build more character.
► 1. Make conscious decisions.
Every day you make dozens of decisions. You decide everything from the foods you eat, to the way you treat your customers, to the time you go to bed.
The trouble is, if you’re like most people, you live on autopilot. You don’t even think about the long-range consequences of your decisions. In fact, you may not even realize that you are making dozens of decisions throughout the day that will affect your future forever.
You may not stop to think about the fact that your eating choices of today may shorten your life expectancy tomorrow. You may not stop to think that your clever, witty putdown of a coworker may cost you a promotion next year.
You need to make every decision as consciously as possible. Be conscious of the outcome you want to achieve and make your decisions accordingly. Afterall, you make your decisions, but then your decisions make you.
That’s exactly what Eileen Zierman experienced. She told me she had been thinking and thinking and thinking for years about attending my Journey-to-the-Extraordinary experience but never made a conscious decision to do anything about it.
Then she made a conscious decision. She told me:
“I thought if I could spend lots of dollars on fishing trips, I could sprout my wings and invest in your Journey-to-the-Extraordinary experience. I could learn more about myself, my relationships, and my work. Well, I went and I’m doing the work and it’s working. What a blessing from God. It was money well spent. I’m excited about the learning and it feels WONDERFUL.”
► 2. Do what’s right.
Do what’s right, whether or not it’s cool, popular, expedient, or politically correct.
That will be challenging for you, because there are lots of people just waiting to call you old-fashioned, narrow-minded, judgmental, or even a hater … all because you don’t agree with them. And that in itself is not right, other people putting a guilt trip on you for simply following your conscience.
It will also be challenging for you because our modern culture focuses more on reputation than character. In other words, our modern culture puts more emphasis on looking good than being good.
Fortunately, a person’s character is like a fence. It cannot be strengthened by whitewash. Poor character can only be covered up for a short period of time.
So do what’s right. It will give you the self-esteem you need for your own happiness and it will set the foundation for more productive relationships. Even if people don’t agree with you, they will at least trust you because they know you’re a straight shooter.
►3. Keep your commitments.
Winners always do this. They do what they say they’re going to do despite circumstances.
Losers, on the other hand, leave room for backing out of their commitments. They say, “I’ll see… I’ll think about… Let me get back to you… I’d rather keep my options open … When I get around to it … and… Maybe.” And when they make commitments, what they really mean is, “Sure, I’ll do it, if nothing else comes up, if I don’t get a better offer, and if I feel like it.”
That’s not commitment. And that’s not character. It’s nothing more than selfishness.
If you’re going to be a person of character, if you’re going to lead a team or an organization, if you’re going to lead a family, you’ve got to make and keep your commitments. No excuses. Afterall, you don’t build character on the flimsy foundation of what you may or may not do.
►4. Do a bit more.
As someone said, “To obtain excellence, you must care more than others think is wise, risk more than others think is safe, dream more than others think is practical, and expect more than others think is possible.”
I call it “The Slight Edge” concept. It means that the person who wins isn’t 100 times better than the competition. Or even 10 times better. They’re simply the ones who are a little better at the job or do a little more of the important things. They have a “slight edge.”
For example, the baseball player who has a 300 plus batting average will earn 10 times as much as the player who only hits 250. The difference is only one hit every ten times at bat.
The same is true in business. The salesperson that makes one extra call a day will tend to outearn their counterparts who quit a bit earlier.
And the student who studies an extra hour a day gets an extra 15 days of learning each year. Will that make a difference? Absolutely. And it will also build his character … a lot more than the student who studies just enough to get by.
Vincent Van Gough knew about this principle. He said, “Great things are not done by impulse but by a series of small things brought together.”
What about you? Are you doing a bit more than you have to? If so, you’re building character that will serve you well.
