Everybody in the world asks the same question. All executives, all managers, supervisors and coworkers. Even all spouses, partners and parents ask the same question.
So what’s the question? If you don’t know, you’re in trouble.
And if you don’t know the answer to the question, you are having a lot more stress, anger, anxiety, frustration, and disappointment than you need to have at work and at home. And you’re getting a lot less engagement from the people around you.
To make your life and work as positive, productive, and profitable as possible, you must know…
► 1. The critical QUESTION everybody asks
The question is … How do I get people to do what I want them to do?
At my onsite keynote, half, and full-day programs and at my two-day Journey-to-the-Extraordinary experience, every day at least one person, and sometimes several people, pull me aside for one-on-one coaching. And they all ask me the same question.
In just the last two weeks, for example,
- At the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, one of their scientists asked me, “How do I get my boss to listen to my ideas on how we can streamline our testing process?”
- At the Florida Association of City Clerks, a clerk asked me, “How do I get an irate local resident to calm down and follow our city codes?”
- At the Mayo Clinic, one of the department supervisors asked me, “How do I get my people to take responsibility and do what they say they’re going to do?” and
- At the U.S. Army Tank-Automotive & Armaments Command, a contract specialist asked me, “How do I get a particular coworker to stop all her negative talk that is hurting the morale in our work area?”
You get the point. Like everyone else, you also want to know how to get people to do what you want them to do.
You could sit down right now and write out six or seven things you want your spouse to do. And you could write out another list that applies to your kids, your relatives, your coworkers, your customers, and everyone else you encounter.
So now you know THE question. “How do I get people to do what I want them to do?”
Notice my emphasis on the word “I.” Because if you don’t know the right question, you’ll focus on what’s wrong with the other person instead of what YOU can do about it.
Once you know the question, you’ve got to know the right answer. Here it is.
► 2. The super powered ANSWER that gets people to do what you want them to do.
The answer comes from one of my early mentors and iconic motivational speaker Zig Ziglar. He said, “You can get everything in life that you want if you’ll just help enough other people get what they want.”
Chances are you’ve heard that answer or some variation of that answer before. And chances are you’ve dismissed that answer as somewhat of a cliché. And chances are you’ve never fully implemented that answer into every part of your life, work, and relationships.
If so, you’ve done so at your own expense. Because in the book of Luke, the 6th chapter, there’s a verse that says, “Give and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”
In other words, how much you give … and how well your giving matches the needs of the other person … will determine how much cooperation you get back.
That’s what Darby Mitchell, a procurement analyst for the US Army Joint Munitions Command, learned. She says, “When I learned how to give using your respect-frame technique at your Journey-to-the-Extraordinary program, I thought, ‘Wow. What an eye opener. What a simple, powerful way to get others to work with me.’ I’m now using respect frames with a vengeance and loving the results. I’ve never seen the people around me be more engaged, work harder, and stay more positive.”
(To register for my Chicago Journey on October 25-26, 2018 and receive a $600 tuition scholarship if you register by July 31st, click here. Pam insert hot link To register for my Pierre, SD Journey on November 29-30, 2018 and save $600, click here.
The entire second day of my Journey program is focused on the 6 Keys to Positive, Productive Relationships. In other words, how to get people to do what you want them to do.
Of course, I can’t share all those techniques here in a few hundred words, but here’s one tip to get you started. Come back next Tuesday for Part 2 of this article.
► 3. Treat everybody like a customer.
Even though I “learned” this concept intellectually years ago, I wasn’t always practicing the technique. It took my wife to bring it home for me.
After a few weeks of a heavy speaking schedule, after spending huge amounts of time in my office, and after numerous phone calls with my customers, my wife turned to me and made a simple request. “Would you please just treat me like a customer?”
Then it hit me. I would never tell my customer I would call them back and then fail to do so. I would never put my customer on hold for a few hours or a few days until I got all my work done. I would never sort-of listen to my customer as I was reading my email. But that’s exactly what I was doing to my wife.
Fortunately, I wised up. I learned to not only treat my wife as a customer, but also make sure she was my #1 customer. And as you can imagine, the results are nothing short of a healthy, happy, and exciting relationship.
My advice for you today? Treat everybody like a customer. As Luke says, “Give and you will receive.”
Dr. Zimmerman’s Tuesday Tip, Issue 943 – The ONE question that everybody asks. The ONE answer that gets people to do what you want.